Saturday, June 15, 2013

like quicksand

For the last eight years I've gone between feeling OK and depressed.  For the last two weeks or so, depression has taken over my life once again.  I guess it started when my fake younger sister came to me with some concerns and asked me for advice.  I started to think about things for her and for me...well, it was for her and I was wondering why I can't listen to my own advice.  Add in seasonal depression and the 2 weeks of rain we had and all these thoughts lately about fears and insecurities and struggling to find myself and of course a depression/slump is in order.  I've shed a few tears/cried probably everyday for the last week and a half.

I have a few things to look forward to.  Next week I'll be in Indianapolis, in July I am taking some days off, in August I am heading to Idaho/Wyoming, September I am going to Brazil and November is San Diego.  I hate to wish time away, but I am looking forward to getting out of here for a few days...even if most of those are work trips where I'll be working my butt off.  But it isn't enough to help me get out of this depression.  I know the longer it stays, the harder it is to get out. Like quicksand.

I guess I'll have a lot to talk to my life coach about on Monday.

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