Friday, February 27, 2015

dating ADD

I am not enjoying the online dating thing too much.  Because I haven't 'settled' people call me picky. I am not being picky, I am open to date a variety of people.  I go on more than one date to feel people out.   I try.  They lose interest before I do most of the time. If I met a person who seems OK, I keep going with it...probably why I was in relationships with other people longer than I should have been.  My recent experience in dating has been that the men are being more picky.  Most are claiming for a relationship...but really aren't 'ready' for one.  They think you are great, but are waiting for something better to come along.

The last guy I went out with, when I went to use the bathroom and came back, he was looking at his potential matches.  Really?  You couldn't wait until the date was over? It wasn't even our first date, it was like date #6.  That date he even wanted to make plans for something days/weeks away.  But...after the following day, I never heard back from him.  Maybe it was because I said I believed in aliens.

Another gentleman I was chatting with via email all day today blocked me by the time I got home.  I was a little surprised, I logged on to give him my phone number as he gave me his just hours earlier.  We were having a great conversation, asking some basic but hard questions...what made him block me? That I wished him luck on his date this weekend?  Said that I'd rather meet in person than continue to email all the time?   That I admired his work history and where he got?  But at least he didn't drag it out like men before him.

My subscription ends next week or the week after...I am not sure I am going to extend it.  The guys out here are slightly better than the men I met in NY, but I am still under impressed.

Why do so many people who are attempting to date have ADD? What is so hard about giving people an actual shot and being in the here and now?

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

busy bee

I haven't written anything in almost 3 weeks.  I have to admit, I have enjoyed being busy and not thinking about blogging...maybe that means it is time to call it quits?  But I am not sure I am ready for that, I might miss it.

Work is OK.  It has potential...but I am also mad at myself for allowing them to pay me so little.  After the first two weeks I had a breakdown and considered looking for jobs again.   But instead, what I need to focus on for a few months is wow-ing them and proving myself and then have a compensation conversation.  If they don't agree...well, I look for another job.  If they do....I'd be happy.  That means I can seriously consider purchasing a place to live, paying down my student loans, saving more, and oh...buying better health insurance.

I also met another guy and have been on several dates.  I am not sure.

And in more of that little free time, I have been doing 'fun' things (per my yearly goals).  If I get around to it, I will write about it, eventually.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Second week of work recap

This was really like my first week.  I was on my own in this new job.

Everyone didn't want to overwhelm me, so the first three days I spent 90% of my time cleaning.  I cleaned and sanitized everything in/on my desk.  I moved bookcases and books.  I changed the bathroom from a storage closet to a bathroom.  I threw away about 60 empty boxes/lids, a desk for a kid, an AV cart that could barely stand up on its own.  The previous lady, as sweet as she is, was a hoarder.  There were empty bags everywhere in addition to empty rolls of tape, yeah, just the plastic part.  I threw away and recycled bins and bins worth of stuff.  She must have had 30 clipboards.

But I also made a mess.  I didn't understand her method of work, and so I just piled papers on top of papers.  It is going to take weeks to look through and understand some of this stuff.

Friday's will always be the busiest day with people coming in and out, so that will be nice.

The commute still sucked, one day when we had some bad weather, it took me one hour and 45 minutes to get to work.  Usually it is about 40 minutes in the morning and 50-60 in the evening.  I've been practicing different routes, but so far haven't found a road less traveled.

Looking forward to keeping busy, not only with the everyday work...but with the several other projects that need to be started.

Friday, February 20, 2015

first week at job recap

My first week of work went well.  It was a lot to take in between learning a little the company as well as trying to think in my head how to make it more....clean/organized.  Since I was by the side of the lady retiring, my first week wasn't really MY first week.

Retired lady was really sweet.  We went out for a really nice dinner and had a long chat about her career there and her hopes for retirement.  She just kept saying over and over how happy she was that they selected me; she had a good feeling.

Later that week I attended an event where I met active members.  I am not good with small talk, and the two hours went really slow...but I made it through and hopefully left a nice impression with them.  The following day I met even more people...and I told them they'd have to remind me of their names as I met quite a few people in less than 24 hours.  That is the hard part, not having photos and names to 'study' from, but the occasional repetition.

Overall, it was a good week.  An overview of sorts.  I kept worrying that there is so much to learn and do...would I succeed?  Would I win them over after such an attachment to my predecessor?  Of course I can do it...why wouldn't I?  It is just a matter of time that I will feel comfortable and understand my new position.

Sunday, February 15, 2015

what did I get myself into?

Surprisingly I was not too nervous for my first day of work.  Maybe reality didn't hit that I'd be working again.  The traffic getting to work was bad, about 50 minutes to go 20 miles; glad I got a book on tape from the library!

When I walked in, the lady I am replacing gave me a huge hug.  She is ready for retirement and was so glad that they found someone to replace her.  I'd be training with her for a week.  

She took me around to the 4 offices + 3 other areas, a nice amount of space for such a small organization.  But oh my....there were papers, stuff, supplies, etc EVERYWHERE.  I knew they mentioned document management needing to be a project, but I was not prepared to see a work hoarder.  Then we sit down and go over some things in the computer.  The 'database' that they paid someone to do, was a simple excel spreadsheet that only captures demographic information and a few other pieces of information.  Next she shows me some of her clip boards of things to do, sign up sheets, etc.  She must have sixty clipboards.  I was mentally exhausted after the first three hours of wondering what did I get myself into?  There is so much work to fix.  I am not getting paid enough.  What would I do first?  Oh my.  

In the afternoon I signed some papers to get computer access, access to the financial application and an email.  The ID badge and parking would be for later this week.

We didn't stop for lunch. I only took one bathroom break.  It was a long day. A day of really, just an overview.  I still have so much to to learn/understand/grasp the timeline.  I wasn't nervous about the starting of work, so much as...will I succeed in this job?  And I am hoping the board understands that these projects will take time.

But as much paper, crap and stuff there was everywhere...I still am excited about it.  The job is right up  my alley.

Friday, February 13, 2015

uneventful last free day

My last free day was uneventful.  I kept wondering, what should I do with this last day of not working?  But I've had seven months of not working, I don't have money to shop, the snowshoeing hurt my lungs so I couldn't go for a hike, what else was there?

In the end I went to the grocery stores, had my eyebrows waxed, watched a few movies...and just really didn't do anything.  Isn't that the whole point of relaxing?

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

accepting the job

I met with the man in charge to discuss salary and benefits of the potential job.  I knew they could not met my salary requirements, they mentioned that two weeks ago, but I was hopeful they would come back with something that wasn't horrible.  And it seemed completely genuine, them not having enough money.  I looked through their 990 and I know they were extremely pleased with my work history and my potential from them, I know they were new to the whole hiring thing...and they wanted to give as much as they could so I would say yes.

They wanted to give me two weeks vacation....I got three.  The salary was in the range I expected it to be based on conversations...but the kicker is, that the health benefits are deducted from that salary...not in addition.  That means when I select my health insurance, I have to factor the cost of the insurance against what I think I'd use vs. if it is better for me to have as salary.  I can't go for the $400 monthly premium and will end up with a $200-250 premium with a high deductible.  Also, there is no company match/contribution into a retirement plan.

It seems that my employment choices over the last three years keep going down...not up.  I keep losing money or benefits as the job changes...but on the positive side, the jobs have/will be great learning experiences.

So, while I am nervous financially about my future, I am very excited to be starting this particular job.  The title is great, the work sounds interesting...and it holds a lot of potential for molding and fixing, which I am really looking forward to.

Monday, February 9, 2015

county health service - STI testing

Before the booty text, I made an appointment for a STI screening with the local health services department, thinking that since the guy took off his condom the first time...I needed to be sure I was ok.  They were able to get me in the following morning.  Hours later I go and have sex again with the guy, figuring if I contracted anything, it probably would have been from the first time, well, provided he didn't sleep with other people since then.  Don't lecture me.

Point is it is smart to get tested, and frequently.

My appointment was for 9am but they asked me to get there at 8:15 to fill out paperwork.  I arrived, filled out an orange check in card and had a seat until I was called.  I went to a check in desk and verbally provided information, supplied my photo id and then signed and filled out about 10 sheets of paper.  Consent forms, disclosure forms, financial information, medical history forms, emergency contact form, etc.  When I was done, I was brought into an exam room for height, weight, blood pressure and then escorted to the bathroom to pee in a cup and then told to wait until I was called.  I waited about 15-20 minutes and met with the midwife.  She reviewed my paperwork, asked questions and I confirmed why I was there.  We went over possible tests and I asked about incubation times for the infections.  She explained that they use a sliding scale for testing and services.  I started to wonder...oh, how much will I have to pay for this? Yikes.  In NY this was a free service.  The midwife then supplied me with a vaginal swab and a breast gown.  She left the room and I was to collect my own vaginal sample with the supplied equipment.  I read the instructions twice.  I pulled down my pants, unwrapped the swab, stuck the swab in and moved it all around for 30ish seconds.  Removed, opened the tube with liquid, inserted stick breaking off the top and closed the lid.  Pulled up my pants and then took off my top and bra so she can give me a breast exam.  When that was all done they collected a little blood for the syphilis test.  I was brought to the checkout/financial area.  They gal provided an invoice based on the sliding scale.  My jaw dropped, $274.  Yikes.  Was it worth it?  But then I realized, I owned nothing...because I make nothing.  It was free for me.  8:15 am - 9:40 am.  Not bad.

Compared to the NY site, this site was more efficient, friendly, they didn't belittle me with my sexual past, was not as confidential, and is more of a doctor's office than just a walk-in clinic. I did not get a bag full of free condoms, although I think there were some on the wall.

When I get health insurance...I probably won't go back to the county department since I'll have found doctors and have some of these services covered.

Thursday, February 5, 2015

the booty text

The guy texted me asking me to come over so I can take advantage of him.  A clear booty call.  Question I do it or not?  In the 'for' column I have...well, at least it wouldn't be a one night stand and maybe I'll get a better read on him.  In the 'bad idea' column is that it is clearly a booty call.
I went for it.  I know, shame on me.  But I really hate the idea of 'wasting' a number on a guy for sex just once.  And I have a few guys back home that I'd sleep with on occasion/when the need arose, so it might not be a bad thing to have a guy out here for that purpose.

The decorative bed pillows were prepped (off the bed), the three candles lit, and the ceiling fan on.  I commented on the fan being on and he said it was because I was so hot the last time.  If nothing else, he remembered that and was fairly considerate when it came to my comfort.

The sex was fast.  I didn't realize he came though; I have such a hard time with that sometimes.  Why are guys so quiet?  I certainly don't feel anything; am I supposed to?  He took out his little toy and attempted to please me.

I hung around and we chatted about nothing interesting. Got dressed, he put on a movie and then half way through kicked me out because he was tired.  At the door he asked me to follow up with him about the job, and I was surprised and asked if he really wanted to know or was just being polite.  He claimed to want to know.  I made a snide remark about not seeing each other for another 2-3 weeks and he seemed surprised that is how long it was since the last time.  Maybe he is just genuinely clueless.

I left not feeling used or dirty or gross, I knew what I was getting when I accepted the invitation, but rather I felt disconnected and I don't care.  Sure, I want a relationship...but this is not it. Maybe there will be more casual sex or maybe it will evolve.  Maybe he'll go out with other people and realize I am the lesser evil and want to date - but by then it will be too late because I won't be second pick yet again.

Monday, February 2, 2015

last minute getaway

I was chatting with my parents when they were en-route to Florida; that sounded like a nice getaway. I haven't been a way for a while since I gave up the chance to go home for the Christmas holiday for an interview.  As it turned out, when the job called and selected me as their top candidate I had a feeling I wouldn't be taking a day off for a I I called my family friends down in Florida and invited myself down there for a few days and booked a ticket for that night.  I was able to spend time with my parents and them and it was really just so relaxing and wonderful.  I felt the stress melt away.  The palm trees made me happier.  It was sunny and 74 degrees.  It was the perfect getaway.

I told my parents and friends about the job and it being 95% a sure thing.  We still needed to meet to discuss the salary and benefits, but provided I accept it...I'd be starting work soon.  They were thrilled.  Things are starting to fall into place.

My first day we walked 5th Avenue in downtown Naples, I went to a fancy dinner at the Ritz Carlton with a former co-worker, my former ED, and the Presidential Team who happened to be in town for a retreat.  I was so happy I was able to see my friend and also catch up with the executives - it is always good to maintain those connections.  The following day we drove to Captiva and had lunch in the Bubble Room and did a little window shopping in Sanibel (I did this last year when I was there too), the day after was an afternoon trip to Naples Pier, sitting on the beach for 15 minutes, a sight seeing sunset cruise and a dinner we waited 50 minutes to be sat at (they quoted a 15 minute wait time!).  My last day we had breakfast at the club house, toured open houses or model houses, and catching rays from the sun by the pool.  Then it was time for the sad goodbyes.

Booking the trip last minute was a little pricey...but I saved money not needing a hotel or rental car and really, seeing my parents was worth it.

Sunday, February 1, 2015

2014 Fantasy Football Rundown

After a very successful first year of fantasy football, I was hesitant to embrace it this year - would it be as fun and exciting?

I asked Mountain Man if he wanted to play his own team in our league, continue to assist me or perhaps he didn't want to be involved at all.  He said he'd assist.

This year, our league grew from a ten team to a twelve team...which made the draft even more difficult with the better players being picked by more people, lessening your chance of getting more top players.

An hour or so before the draft, I find out I was #8.  I did research like last year, but it wasn't enough.  Add on top of that that our commissioner changed our pick time from 2 minutes to 1 minute...not bad if you know who you want...but when your list dwindles down to no one...and you need to compare people, there just wasn't time.

This was my draft selection...
  • Drew Brees (he wasn't supposed to be my first pick, but autopilot was picking QBs for those that didn't make the live draft, and I wanted to be sure I secured him)
  • Giovani Bernard (had him last year)
  • Vernon Davis
  • Antonio Brown (had him last year)
  • Ben Tate
  • Cordarrelle Patterson
  • Rams (OK, so I picked my defense team a little early)
  • Trent Richardson
  • Martellus Bennett
  • Eric Decker (I really didn't want a Giant or Jet...but was best choice at the time)
  • Ryan Tannehill
  • Johnathan Grimes (I had no idea who he was...if only I paid attention to pregames and news and went with Denver's Brandin Cooks!!)
  • Saints 
  • Dan Bailey (had him last year)
  • Benny Cunningham (I had no idea who he was either)
  • Dan Carpenter (this was a mistake...I had people in my queue but they were all taken, I forgot to remove him when I picked up Bailey, and I ran out of time and autopilot picked him up for me at 60 seconds)
Over the course of the season this was the progression:
  • Drew Brees
  • Giovani Bernard
  • Vernon Davis dropped for:
    • Delanie Walker (week 13)
  • Antonio Brown
  • Ben Tate dropped for:
    • Jonas Gray (week 12)
    • Doug Martin (week 14)
    • Charles Johnson (week 15)
  • Cordarrelle Patterson dropped for:
    • Brian Quick (week 6) and only brought in 1 point...week 8/9 injury out of season.
    • Lorenzo Taliaferro (week 9)
    • Vikings (week 11)
    • Rams (week 13 - and they brought in 34 points! Best pick yet!)
  • Rams dropped for:
    • Dolphins (week 3; they were my 3rd choice) dropped for:
    • Eddie Royal (week 5)
    • DeAngelo Williams (week 8)
    • Adrian Peterson (week 14) didn't play him, was hoping maybe his appeal would be overturned
    • Latavius Murray (week 15)
  • Trent Richardson
  • Martellus Bennett
  • Eric Decker
  • Ryan Tannehill dropped for:
    • Kirk Cousins (week 3) never played him
    • Carson Palmer (week 8)
    • Percy Harvin (week 11)
  • Johnathan Grimes dropped for:
    • James Starks (week 2) never played him
    • Jerick McKinnon (week 2 - ZERO points) 
    • Knile Davis (week 3)
    • Tre Mason (week 7)
  • Saints dropped for:
    • Bills (week 2 - but didn't play them and they did well)
  • Dan Bailey
  • Benny Cunningham dropped for:
    • Malcom Floyd (week 1)
    • Brandon LaFell (week 9)
  • Dan Carpenter dropped for:
    • Brian Hartline (week 1) 
    • Dwayne Bowe (week 2)
    • Browns (week 7) never played them
    • Matt Prater (week 10) played only to cover bye week
    • Kyle Orton (week 12) never played him.
How I did:
  • Week 1 - I was projected to win, but I lost by 7 points.  I had to make my nephew mint chocolate cake.  It was a fun project trying to figure out how to make baked goods and ship them over to him, in tact and still yummy.
  • Week 2 - I was projected to lose by 9, instead I won by 5
  • Week 3 - I was projected to win by 3.  Up for bets this week was me taking my niece shoe shopping or her drawing me a picture.  I won by 24.
  • Week 4 - I was projected to lose by 6, I won by 32.
  • Week 5 - I was projected to lose by 6, I lost by 9. 
  • Week 6 - I was projected to lose by 20, I won by 15.
  • Week 7 - I was projected to win by 21, I won by 1...with a TOTAL points of only 63.  It was a weak week.
  • Week 8 - I was projected to lose by 17, I won by 17.
  • Week 9 - I was projected to win by 10, I won by 3, with a total of only 76 points.  It was a nail bitter game on Monday. 
  • Week 10 - I was projected to lose by 19, I lost by 90. 
  • Week 11 - I was projected to lose by 2, I lost by 31.
  • Week 12 - I was projected to win by 15, I won by 22.
  • Week 13 - I was projected to win by 10, I won by 62....and secured the first place seed in my division and second in the league with 9 wins, 4 loses, a PF of 1254 and a PA of 1210.
  • Week 14 - my bye week.  Ended up with 91 points, not too bad.
  • Week 15 - projected to win by 1, I won by 8, with a final score of 87....which puts me in the championship game!
  • Week 16 - I am playing a team that only lost 2 games this talk about intimidating. I was projected to win by 30 points.  My defense (I played the Bills) and my quarterback (Brees) completely under-performed by a total of 30 points, add in my other under-performers and it wasn't looking good.  I ended with only 66 points (projected was 112) My opponent had two players on Monday, so a 13 point lead with a quarterback and wide receiver left to play is not a good feeling.  I hoped that his quarterback, who was missing practice with the flu and his injured wide receiver would under perform.  The game was going great for me, at half time, between the two players, they only had 1 point!  I still had a chance!  Then within a few minutes of quarter three, it was over.  A touchdown involving both those players...and the points continued to increase.  I ended up losing by 20 points.
What a great year though.  Sure, I won last year and it was thrilling but this year I got so far and it was such a challenge.  My roster wasn't as loaded with good players as the year before and I still did well. I am proud of myself and happy that Mountain Man still advised me on players/teams...but also realized he is more of a fluke in the guy did well one game, must pick him up and then he doesn't come close to scoring that well again...for weeks.  I will have to remember that for next year.