Saturday, March 23, 2013

the cat is out of the bag

March Madness one of my obsessions, good thing it is for a short time because my anxiety, blood pressure, and sleep all suffer during this time.  I like to win, what can I say.  This year my group extended - it was just my immediate family and the kids for the last two years, but this year my super close family friends joined in.  Between both families, there are 24 of us.  It is making the game even more fun because we are jumping higher number and there are more people involved with the texting and chatter.

So why then, a family friend member asked, is there 25 participants in our group?  Who is this other person. To which I replied, "oh, that is my ManFriend...congratulations, you are observant, I wonder who else will notice."  I didn't get any texts for a few days, even my sister's didn't say anything even though they know about him.  When I saw 90% of the group out at dinner last night, I heard "so, denise, is this extra person your boy toy"...and so I turned, faced my mother and said "OK, well, there you go, I am sorta dating someone"  and she high chirped and squealed   

I have no doubt that my mother hasn't known something was up for months, I mean we've been fooling around for 14 months...but you don't know my mother.  In like 2 days, I am sure I'll get an email/call from her friends, they will all congratulate me on having a boyfriend   Word is going to spread like wildfire.  At Easter next week, my aunts/cousins will all ask me about it.  And I hate that because I don't know if this has a future and I really hate that she tells people things that have no bearing on other people's lives.  She can't be casual about it.  It is more like...oh, denise found a husband, I wonder when she'll get married and have kids and buy a house. I don't see it that way, maybe that is just a sign he isn't the one.  But I shouldn't only have to introduce and tell my family about possible husbands....shouldn't they be OK with having a different boyfriend every year or few months?  Can't it just stay between our family?  I get they want me to be happy, I want that too. But I also want no pressure from them and no disappointment when it doesn't work out.   I just want them to be like - oh denise isn't around but I know where she is, and I don't have to worry and fear for her safety.

So, the cat is out of the bag, and I thought I did it in kind of a cute way, by having him participate and seeing who noticed - and who was gutsy enough to ask about it.  

1 comment:

  1. I gosh I hate all that.

    My family can be the same way. Before I was dating Fletcher I had to make sure NO ONE knew about anything. And forget about bringing someone home to dinner.

    Although my family isn't as large as yours, mine is just as nosy ;)