Wednesday, September 11, 2013

virtual feelings

Way back when, people used to send love letters to each other.  In fact, my grandmother barely knew the man she started to write in the military.  But during all the correspondence, they developed feelings for each other and when he came home, they married.

These days, we have the Internet, email and text messages.  Unfortunately, it is too easy to develop feelings for someone you barely know; no wonder why there is so much cheating and divorce.

For example, let's say I have talked to a fellow that I know is involved in an early relationship.  Talking to him so frequently is wrong on my end but at the same time I enjoy our conversations so to stop is really hard.  I am sure millions of people feel this way and in turn, there is an emotional cheating and then perhaps acting on it.

Worse, I think about that early relationship and am jealous because while I think of that fellow, he is out getting laid and having dinner and doing whatever else people do while dating.  However,  his messages to me seem like he might be interested too, and by interested too, I mean there is an low level of flirting, nothing outright.

Add to that, I forget about the ACTUAL person, and because this is all virtual, I am making a new person. A person who as all the qualities I love in a small memory of being in awe when we met and I am forgetting all the other things...things that may not be significant, but aren't the good things. It is easy to get rid of the bad things when you are relating them to the person you've now invented.  This will set me up for disappointment later on because when our paths cross, I might not like the real guy compared to the one I've spent months casually chatting with.

And, I am so against cheating because of what happened to me.  And I slept with the guy and now we chat somewhat regularly? That isn't right if his relationship went from a few dates to over a month/relationship.  He very recently mentioned "I am not sure what to make of the relationship yet".  Which to me screams it isn't going to work...I know if I want to continue dating someone after date #2.  I'd think after a month he'd have a clue.  I can't but think I might be to blame.  Perhaps guys will date someone they don't really like just so they get laid regularly whereas I can go months without it.

I guess I need to fire him as my fantasy football consultant so I don't have a reason to email him twice a week; or him text me when one of my players made an awesome play.

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