Wednesday, September 4, 2013

not much different than you

I was chatting with one of my volunteers a few days ago and he was talking about all New York has to offer and that he imagined my life to be this amazing single in the city kind of life.  Always going out on the town, lots of friends, always things to do.

I felt bad laughing, but NO that is no where near my life.

I started to wonder...maybe it should be. Maybe I need to do more, maybe that would lead to more dating and meeting my future husband, maybe my life would feel more fulfilled.

But honestly, just thinking about that kind of life exhausts me.  It just isn't me.  And I don't think I want it to be.

I am more of a homebody, I enjoy being home and around family and some friends.  I like to do a few things locally - a hike, kayak, beach, things around the house, a meal out.  I like to keep busy during the day...but I don't hit up the bars or a club at night.  I think it is a good balance for me.  And honestly, I couldn't afford to have that other kind of single life.

The main difference between your lives and mine is that I live alone, my household isn't 2+ people.  I cook 95% of my meals, I work full time, I go to little league games and science fairs,  I help with homework, reports and studying for final exams (for my nieces and nephews), I do laundry, run errands and I manage the finances & household.  I even take vacations...but instead of going somewhere with screaming children like Disneyland, I go to places a bit more relaxing for me and instead of having an active and loud home, my place is virtually silent.  Being single doesn't mean a glorious fun life all the time, it just means less people are involved.

Just the other day, I heard on ten-ten winds that there are a lot more single households now than there were years ago...and I don't just mean because of all the divorces, but also those that never married.  I like to think that I helped set that trend...because out of all the people I know...I am the only one who has this kind of life.  People don't understand it and a lot of people think it is more glamorous that it really is.  It's been just a few days over 7 years since I've been single; shocking how much time has passed.  It took a while, but I am getting settled into my single life and I have my own routines and way of life that I actually am OK with.  If I was destined for a single least I know I can handle it.

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