Well, it was time for 'the talk' with my male friend. After a weekend alone again I drank a little and all these random thoughts started to go through my head. Drinking and thinking rationally do not go together, but then again, the thoughts have been in my head for a while anyway.
Last week there was an impromptu date that ended back at his place...and what do I see in the sink? 2 wine glasses. **FLASHING LIGHTS** go off in my head because why would there be two? I have been around enough cheating that this was a sure fire sign to me that my friend had company the night before.
Then there are the times that he claims to not have plans but yet is unavailable to see me. Really? Why wouldn't the man want to get laid? **FLASHING LIGHTS** sign he is getting it somewhere else.
Now let's add in the fact that in the last two weeks I've noticed a difference. He used to text me first, but then it was always me. I was asking what he was doing and making the plans..I didn't like this. **FLASHING LIGHTS** was I becoming a backup/midweek only kind of girl? I don't want to be second. And why were we seeing less of each other now than we did a month ago?
So in the midst of drinking, I decide that if I was going to continue to pass time and hang out with him, then things need to change. But how do you approach these topics with someone new? As we are kissing, I am resisting doing anything else. Then I realize now was the time. I needed to have this small 'talk'. But how do you tell someone after two months you want them to start using a condom? Isn't it a little late for that?
I fumble and I sound incoherent even though in my head I practiced it several times throughout the day. "Hmm. Well...Look, I....If you are sleeping with other people, then we need to start using condoms. I am having a hard enough time finding a husband now, let alone after I contract some sort of STD from you". Yes folks, that is what I said. He starts laughing and tells me I am crazy. And I continue "well, you are always telling me that you are a bachelor and that one is never enough for you and I don't expect..." He cuts me off essentially not answering my questions or reassuring me but avoids it all together (typical man) and confirms that bachelor is just another word for single and I am over thinking the wrong things.
So I wasn't able to get my examples in nor did I get a "I am not dating/sleeping with anyone else". And I am sad to report that my little talk had zero effect.
If you learn anything from me...I hope that you will stick to your guns more than I do.