I wasn't planning on another post today...but I have to write about this.
A few days ago, Bank Boy and I text for a while. He was being really good about not talking to me when the whole HSK thing was going on a few months ago - but still asked for sex a few times, which I denied him. We hadn't spoken since...until Monday. A 'normal' converstation somehow he gets to end up talking about sex.
So, just a few moments ago, Bank Boy asks me if he can see me on Saturday but I say no - I might have a date with matchmaker #2 guy - I wasn't 100% sure yet.
He seriously just flipped out. Here word for word:
BB - so I guess we can't meet?
BB - We can't f*ck?
Me - Not if my date is there!
BB - So what are you telling me?
Me - That it won't work
BB - So I won't ask you for sex again, I'm not your 'fall back' like other guys have you as
Me - What? You asked ME. And the date is someone new.
BB - Whatever if you really want it you can do it, but you always put me just in case nothing else happens, f*ck that!
Me - LOL, you are angry today.
BB - You think it's funny? That's why guys keep doing it to you, isn't that funny as well?
Me - Hilarious. Who knows, my date might end up my future husband and I am definitely not going to f*ck him right away. As for the other guy that is over and it had nothing to do with me asking for sex.
BB - Sure Denise one day it will happen, keep waiting.
Me - I don't know why you are so mad, our 'arrangement' was just sex. But you get so f*cking possessive, it scares me. I haven't asked you for sex EVER. I just agreed to it. But maybe now you will stop talking to me and harassing me for sex.
BB - I am not possessive, I don't have nor I want to (he missed a word somewhere in there), but every time want it you put me on a waiting list, again f*ck that!
BB - Harassing you????? HAHAHHAHA
BB - Whatever Denise, you always want to feel like the victim. stop that, maybe that's your problem, get over it.
Me - Why are you still talking to me?
BB - Get over that Sh*it, I'm done.
Me - Good
BB - Why are you still talking to me?
(clever. use my line against me)
Hilarious stuff.
I am certainly no slut like he makes me seem. Out of the 4 times I had sex in 2010 - 2 were with him and two were with someone else. This year, I've gotten laid more than that...but only once or twice with him. Sure, if I was 'desperate' I might consider it...but I've had long droughts and it doesn't bother me so much. I certainly don't think I ever strung him along since I was constantly telling him he wasn't the guy for me, that most of the time I said no to his askings, and I was always honest with him telling him I preferred other men. What guy is stupid enough to still ask? Well, good for him I guess. I might have rejected him, but at least for the last year or two I was honest about it with him, not my fault he didn't understand.
But, this does make me wonder...do I let guys treat me like how he claims? Is that why I can't hold onto a guy? I never considered that before. Do I see myself as a victim all the time? No, for the most part I don't. Just of course with my two big breakups...and I did let them both string me along for a long time. But the other guys? Hardly. And what other guys? I am not good at meeting people. I think if I met someone...soemthing good could evolve, but generally, until now, I wasn't ready for that. Am I attracted to the kind of guy that victimizes me? Yeah, you know what..maybe a little and it is only because that is all I have known...I don't want it, certainly. I am sure in my future relationships it won't be like that. Best part is, I know the signs to look for but generally if a guy shows interest - I just go with it. I eventually develop feelings. Once those feelings are there - then that is when I fight to keep the guy.
But I never had feelings for Bank Boy.
Think this will be the last I hear from him ever? I doubt it.
No comments:
Post a Comment