My date called me last Sunday to make plans to get together. We decided to meet on Friday, and agreed that small talk on the phone was not a great idea until we met each other. It always sucks when you have a decent conversation and meet someone and it turns out they are hideous. Well, OK the likelihood of that is slim, but you know what I mean.
He messages me what he is wearing and since I knew his ethnicity, I was able to find him somewhat quickly considering how many people were there. It looked like he was a bit surprised when I walked in, but he did see a picture of me (yes, it was a recent one with the new cut). We sit down and I order a drink. We talk a little about a lot of different things: food (he is a vegetarian), animals, travel, music, TV shows, movies, architecture, job, past relationship, family, you name it. Conversation when on topic flowed well and we both talked. He did comment that he came up with most of the topics, and I just laughed and said yes I don't have a lot of practice in topics but I was still sharing a lot. I didn't have a lot to drink, and he did comment on that.
Overall he was nice. He had some qualities I am looking for but there are two major things that would hold me back 1) he is Indian, but has been in the US for at least 15 years....but how do you not consider if his culture would play a part in raising a family or other important life things? He wasn't like super Indian where I couldn't understand him (he actually as a slight British accent) and his skin wasn't dark 2) His age. OK, so he is only like 41. My original age range was 30-39...what is another year or two especially if they still act 'young'. But I still wonder if that is too big an age gap for me. I kinda freaks me out that when I was 10, he was able to legally drink. 3) can I date a vegetarian?
Would I go out with him again? I wouldn't be opposed to it, to learn more, but I didn't get any sort of sense of attraction. I would prefer to meet other people and rule them out and then maybe agree to another date - which I know is a wrong outlook, so I guess my answer would be NO not for a date...but perhaps as a travel partner or whatever.
So when I got home a little while ago, I filled out the 'post date' questionnaire that asked some basic questions like: where did you go? did you like it? What was your favorite characteristic of your date? Least favorite characteristic of your date? Would you go out with him again? What would you have changed? Blah blah blah.
On my way home, I messaged HSK. We briefly conversed but no plans were made and I wasn't going to start since I feel like I've reached out way more than he has, even though it isn't a competition...but remember - don't want to over do it or under do it. Complicated stuff.
I think the age thing is probably ok, but the culture thing could be a deal breaker. It depends on how religious he is. I assume he's Hindu. You'd probably need to know how his family would feel about him marrying a non-Hindu. Also, lots of people in that culture live with their mothers -- they take care of them until they die. That right there would be enough for me to say "bye bye!"
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