Girly Girl

On my most recent blind date, the guy - only about 60 minutes in - tells me I seem like a girly girl.  I laugh...at first a little uncomfortable, but then I remember, that I just realized this myself about a year ago.

I was talking to my ex-coworker last year and she tells me that I was high maintenance. I didn't agree with her...but after a few weeks I realized she might have been right.  And with high maintenance comes being a girly girl.  Something laughable.  When did I become this person?  Ask SI if he would have agreed that "Denise is a girly girl"/"Denise is high maintenance" and he would probably have laughed so hard at that statement and fell off his chair and said no way - that is why I cheated on her and made sure my mistress was. 

And that above 90% possible statement makes me a little angry because when I think of that mistress - and all she represents...it irks me that I could fall to that level that is so below me.  When I think of high maintenance girly girls...I think of fake, skirts/dresses, always in high heels, always looking the best, latest trends or lots of lace & ruffels, super small eater, snotty, bitchy, annoying, superficial, a lot of non-friends, manicures/pedicures, frequent spas & gyms, spend a lot of time on getting ready and someone I wouldn't want to be friends with.

 I don't think I am THAT bad.  OK, so I've bought some skirts and dresses in the last few years but they are all conservative, I owe a lot of shoes, but don't wear half of them, I don't own sweatpants and tee shirts, and I can be a little bitchy to people that offend me/I don't like...but surely I am not fake, superficial, a small eater, snotty (well, I am NY snotty for those outside this area...but WITHIN this area, I am not snotty...this is like the capital of snotty rich housewives), hang cheesey things off my rearview mirror, make high pitch shrills, or need constant attention.

So what is wrong with straightening my hair, wearing makeup to enhance my face, 70% of the time looking nice, only lasting a few hours in 2+ inch heels, not watching/playing sports and not killing bugs?   Aren't those 'normal'?

I am starting to wonder if the issue isn't that I am girly girl...but that I am independent.  There is a huge difference.  And I have a hard time dumbing that down, I might seem a little 'cold' but I am not - independence is something a lot of women never experience and men don't understand independent women - so maybe I seem high maintenance but I don't think I am - I am down to Earth, normal, and take care of myself to a certain extent.