my accomplishments

Sometimes I feel like my life is so boring and I haven't accomplished too much...here are highlights.

In 4th grade standardized testing, I was in the very high percentile for analytic understanding, 9 yo.
I came in second place in my 5th grade sprint around the school on field day
At 11, I received the most amount of popcorn in my class every week in school based on participation, attendance and manners
I came in second place in a science fair at 12
Taught myself how to type at 14
I had my first french kiss at 15
I passed my driving test on the first try at 16
I graduated high school in the top third of my class (there were 500+ kids) at 17
I flew on a plane for the first time (and without a parent) at 18
I received two star pin awards for excellent customer service when I worked at a bank; at approx. 21
I graduated from college at 22
I feel in love for the first time at 23
I traveled internationally for the first time at 24
I received my MBA, and jot my first 'real' job at 26
I took my first solo vacation at 27
I became CPR certified at 28 (and again at 33)
I bought a condo at 29
Read over 50 books in one year at 31
I paid off my credit card debt at 33
At 34 I went to South America

long distance, is it worth it?

A long distance romance, I wonder if it is worth it. The space between visits and the spending of money to travel...all for a hope that it might work.  Dating and love always start out as a gamble - but most time if it is local, it seems like less of a risk.

And then what do you have? Short gaps of time to make up for all that time in between.  And that short burst of time is spent evaluating the person, trying to have fun and wondering if it is worth it.

I can easily justify the expense of travel as money that would have otherwise been spent on local dates, well for me, I paid for ManFriend for a year and a half, but I am sure in a more equal 'relationship' the expense is more evenly divided.  But then how often can I really pull that off more frequently? I am broke, I don't have a ton of vacation time...and where is it leading?

Is it worth it?

San Diego with Mountain Man

I had a great trip to San Diego.  It was a work trip with enough personal time in between that I was able to spend a lot of time with Mountain Man.

We went to really nice restaurants, danced the night away at a work function, spent most of Sunday watching football and seeing our fantasy football team lose for the second time this season, had drinks, and then spent a good portion of our last day sightseeing - Coronado Island, Point Loma, Sunset Cliffs, Mission Beach and La Jolla.

The week flew by, and the last day was bittersweet....not knowing what, if anything, lies ahead.

our shadow at the beach at Coronado Island

Point Loma Lighthouse

me at Sunset Cliffs

sharing your baggage

I've often wondered when an appropriate time was to share your baggage with other people.  Of course, one could not share it at all, hoping it would never make an appearance.  I like honesty and if asked, I will share - but sometimes I worry that my baggage would make others treat me differently.

My baggage of course has to deal with the emotional abuse I went through and a man who thought me so insignificant that he carried on with a double life.  I worry that when a man hears that - he will think he can also treat me that way as well because it happened once before; maybe that is all I am worth in their eyes.  

Of course I know I deserve more, but will they? I know a great guy is out there somewhere who when he hears my story will feel so bad he'll want to make it up to me and cherish me to make up for all that lost time.